Hailey & Zen

On behalf of Zen and Hailey, I want to thank all of you for making the journey to be with them today, to share in the magic of celebrating their love and good fortune in having found each other. I like to emphasize that a marriage is always about more than two people coming together. The families and friends here today will continue to serve as a source of love, wisdom, and advice, when requested. Let us not forget those who have come before us and left an indelible mark on our hearts, and a lasting legacy through all who knew and loved them. Let us all now be truly present and enjoy what we are here to witness: these two people standing before you today to express their love for each other and say "I do" to their most important relationship.

I'd like to now offer a blessing for their union in the form of a beautiful poem by Tara Cox. May you have the love only two can know. May you go where only two as one can go. May the sun rise and set in your bonded hearts, and the moon never find you too long apart. May you cherish each other's dreams as your own, and turn stumbling blocks into stepping stones. May you brave life's mountains and miles together. May there be no storm your love cannot weather. May you be lovers and allies and friends. May your souls' conversation never end. May you capture on earth what's in heaven above. May your hearts know the rapture of an uncommon love.

I have a short message on this important day for Hailey and Zen as they prepare to exchange their marriage vows and their wedding rings. Hailey and Zen, a marriage provides so many blessings for a couple, and the list of those blessings is very long, but I'll keep it brief today. I've chosen a few key words to describe some of these blessings: friendship, companionship, stability, intimacy, and, maybe most importantly, family. But more than anything, I believe the greatest blessing a marriage offers us as human beings is the ability to truly come to know love, to share love, and to grow in love within a committed and secure union. In my humble opinion, knowing, sharing, and growing our love is our greatest purpose during our time here on earth.

During your three years together, you have undoubtedly grown in your love for one another through many shared experiences, dozens of conversations about your future, navigating the highs and lows of everyday life, and many more of the circumstances that are part of being human beings in a committed relationship. You have probably said "I love you" more times than you could count, and maybe you had a disagreement or two, but most importantly, you have learned things about each other that make your relationship what it is today: supportive, loving, and unique. Every relationship is unique.

As you enter this new chapter as married partners, continue to seek ways to deepen your love. I'm reminded always of the beautiful words of the Buddhist teacher Thich Nhat Hanh, who wrote that the roots of a lasting relationship are deep listening, loving speech, mindfulness, and a strong community to support you. In addition, I encourage you to be aware of all the moments of perfection in your daily lives, starting with this moment right here today, as you hold each other's hands on your wedding day. No marriage could ever be perfect; there are no perfect humans to make that possible. But the ability to see perfection in simple things, a night at home cooking with each other or with friends and family, a spontaneous adventure to Lake Tahoe or other favorite destinations, or frolicking with Jinx and August on a lazy afternoon: I encourage you to become collectors of all these perfect kinds of moments throughout your marriage, as they are the moments that will form a river of love that flows over discord, doubt, or disappointment.

Hailey and Zen, I wish you every success as you embark on your journey through life together. When the road feels challenging or overwhelming, and it might, let love be your guide. In moments of doubt or despair, again, turn to that love. When it feels like there is nowhere else to turn, remember: your love and friendship will always be your anchor, and it will be in that place that you find the strength to move forward, no matter the day and no matter the season. Okay, ready for the good stuff?

Hailey, do you take Zen to be your lawfully wedded husband? Do you promise to love and cherish him, in sickness and in health, for richer or for poorer, for better or for worse, forsaking all others, as long as you both shall live? "I do." And Zen, do you take Hailey to be your lawfully wedded wife? Do you promise to love and cherish her, in sickness and in health, for richer or for poorer, for better or worse, forsaking all others, as long as you both shall live? "I do." Beautiful. That was four "I do"s for the back row.

Hailey, today I choose you to be my wife, loving what I know of you, and trusting who you will become. I choose you again and again, at the start and finish of every day, no matter the season, no matter the year. I choose you: to struggle and succeed with, to fight and make up with, to love and grow old with. I choose you, knowing there are still trails we will travel, knowing there are mountains left to climb. I choose you, to always be by my side.

Zen, today I choose you to be my husband, loving what I know of you, and trusting who you will become. I choose you again and again, at the start and finish of every day, no matter the season, no matter the year. I choose you: to struggle and succeed with, to fight and make up with, to love and grow old with. I choose you, knowing there are still trails we must travel, knowing there are mountains left to climb. I choose you, to always be by my side.

For generations, couples have exchanged rings as a symbol of their vows. Let these rings reflect that your love carries a past, lives fully in the present, and grows most beautifully into the future.

Hailey: "Zen, I give you this ring as a token of my love and commitment to growing our love. Let it be a reminder that I am always by your side, and I will always be a supportive and loving partner to you." Zen: "Hailey, I give you this ring as a token of my love and commitment to growing our love. Let it be a reminder that I am always by your side, and I will always be a supportive, loving partner to you."

Beautiful. And now, please join both hands, take a tiny step toward each other, and close your eyes. The love already shared by your hearts has been strengthened by the vows you have spoken and the rings you have now exchanged. When you're ready, slowly open your eyes, and don't take your eyes off each other. Zen and Hailey, because you have chosen each other and vowed to love each other in marriage, in accordance with the laws of the State of Nevada, I am deeply honored to pronounce you husband and wife, sealed today in law, and most beautifully in love. And with that, you may kiss your bride.

Some of you traveled pretty far, so we appreciate you all being here for Hailey and Zen and celebrating them the way that they should be. I wrote a couple things down, because I have a couple of stories about Hailey.

I've never known a world without my sister in it. She, unfortunately, had two years without me, but she's okay. I'll never know why I got so lucky to have a sister like Hailey. My sister is the kind of person who, no matter what's going on in her life, will always put others first. She's the kind of person who will move through anything she's going through gracefully, with stoicism and so much strength. She always puts on a strong face for the people she loves, even when she might be going through a more difficult time herself. She's always been my hero: the kind of older sister who, even if she was scared to do something, would do it anyway, and turn around to make sure her younger sister was right there with her.

This reminds me of a story I might regret telling. So, I didn't learn how to swim until I was like ten years old, okay? Not all of us were the little fish Hailey was at three years old in Hawaii. Anyway, one year we went camping, and we were over by the Silver Fork River, and at the time it was a rushing river. It was raging. Hailey and I were always going on little adventures; she was constantly dragging me along, even when I wasn't as confident as she was. At one point we decided to get to this little rock island in the middle of the river. For some reason the jumps on the way to the island, rock to rock over the water, were a lot smaller than on the way back. We made it across just fine, but on the way back, Hailey gracefully jumps across the rocks, not touched by water, and I stood there for about thirty minutes having an existential crisis over this jump. Hailey probably just wanted to go back to the campground and eat a hot dog or something, but she stayed there with me. She never left my side. She told me to jump and that she would be there if anything happened. So eventually I did trust her, and I tried to jump back. Long story short: I absolutely fell in the water. She, without hesitation, reached in and grabbed me before my weak swimming self could get swept away.

In all seriousness, she's probably saved my life many more times than that. That sums up Hailey perfectly: she's always been the kind of person who will put her own fear aside to make sure someone else is okay. She's strong, intelligent, beautiful, and an unbelievably humble human who deserves the biggest of celebrations. Zen, I'm so happy you're that person now, because I know she's going to take care of you, support you, and probably save your life at least once or twice too.

Speaking of Zen: I met him a few years ago, when he and Hailey were first dating. It was close to Valentine's Day. They hadn't been together very long, and Hailey was like, "What if he gets me something? What do I get him?" I didn't know him at all, so I asked the important questions: What's he like? What's he do? She goes, "Oh, he works night shift in a warehouse." I said, "Oh, great, get him some energy drinks. Get him some Red Bulls." And yeah, we slapped a bow on a box of Red Bulls and gave that to him as a gift. He stuck around. I guess the Red Bulls worked. You're welcome.

When I first met Zen, I'm sure he was nervous to meet Hailey's crazy family and scary bald dad, but he handled it with manners and confidence. I immediately noticed something that reminded me of Hailey: he has the ability to put whatever he's going through aside and show up for the people he loves. I've seen it in the way he takes care of his friends, his family, and now Hailey, and I know he'll do the same for Hailey forever. That's what makes me so happy about the two of them. Hailey has spent her whole life taking care of the people around her, as a sister, a friend, and now as a nurse, even when they scratch and kick. She now has someone who's going to take care of her forever, too. Zen, I can't imagine a better person for my sister. You both deserve someone who loves you the way that you love others. You both deserve the world, and I'm so glad you found that in each other. Let's raise our glasses to Hailey and Zen, for a life full of adventure, unconditional love, and lots of laughs. To Hailey and Zen!

Honestly, before I came up here, Riley and I played a game of rock-paper-scissors over who would have to come up here first, and I wish I did not win, because I don't know how I'm going to follow that up. But anyway.

Much like Riley, I don't know a life without my brother. He's been there for the hard times, the good times, and, you know, the times I shouldn't be doing what I'm doing. But through it all, he's stuck with me, and honestly, he's the biggest inspiration in my life. For one, I wouldn't be going to college, doing what I want to do and chasing my dreams, if he wasn't there in my corner pushing me every single way.

I have a funny story. Much like Riley, Zen also taught me how to swim, on a hot summer day at our public pool. Not in Hawaii; we weren't like that. We sat there for probably an hour and a half while he's holding my stomach, telling me to swim like a dog. And at the time I didn't know how to dog-paddle, so I was just flailing around, and he goes, "Here, you hold me and I'll show you." From that moment forward, I knew he'd be in my corner any time I needed him. I'm up here because he asked me to be, and also, selfishly, I wanted to be, so you guys could see how good I look in this suit.

No, seriously. Enough about Zen. I'll share a little story I have about Hailey, which isn't much, because I'm not around much. I live far away, and I'm glad I could be here; Zen helped with that. Zen told me he'd met a girl about a couple months older than me, and my first thought was, "What are you doing? That's too young." But I am glad that he met her, and she's been in his corner since day one. I learned this first story from Zen, I hope he doesn't mind me sharing it, that on their first date he promised her he was not an axe murderer, because that's normal on a dinner date, apparently. But I did get to learn that tidbit, and I'm glad I did.

From the moment I met Hailey, she has been one of the kindest people I've ever seen. The way she treats my brother, the way she treats me, the way she treats my family, is as if we are family, and I guess after today, we are. Maybe it's good, maybe it's bad, I don't know, we'll find out. But honestly, the way that Zen looks at you is the best way I've seen him look at anybody in my entire life. When you walk into a room, his eyes light up, and I'm glad that you two found each other. I'm going to end my speech here so I don't cry in front of you guys. But Zen and Hailey, I love you two infinitely, and I'm glad that you two are together.

For anyone that doesn't know me, I'm Kenzie, and despite being a bridesmaid, I've actually known Zen for longer. When I met Zen, we worked together; he was a lead. And though he doesn't remember our first conversation, I do. What I learned later is that our first conversation was just one of those conversations you have when you're in leadership with a team member, which I was. But it inspired the way that I decided I wanted to lead, so I remember that conversation. After it, he became like a mentor to me without knowing it, and I was always kind of keeping an eye on him to see what he was doing. One day he looked really sad. So I did what you do when somebody looks really sad: I walked over, tapped him on the shoulder, and offered him one singular Ferrero Rocher. Not a pack of them, one singular one that I had in my vest pocket. And from then on, I don't think either of us knew this was going to happen, we became best friends. So he was just kind of stuck with me.

In the last few years, Zen has taught me a lot. He's given me a lot, mostly a lot of advice, and a shoulder to cry on when I'm mad at my husband, wherever he is, and a lot of good times and laughter. But the most important thing Zen has given me is my other best friend, Hailey. When we first met Hailey, Zen is like the little brother of our group, so we were all apprehensive, because we'd seen him go through a breakup. And anyone that knows me knows I have the heart of a hater. I hate people first; they have to earn my love. So the fact that I didn't immediately hate Hailey is remarkable, honestly. And not only did I not hate her, my husband and I did a debrief after we met her, and I was like, "I think she's maybe perfect for him. That's crazy." Anyone that's seen Hailey and Zen together knows they are perfect for each other. A song will come on about some ridiculous disco snails, and Hailey's right there dancing and singing along with it.

So I'm going to give you guys the advice I wish somebody had told me when I got married. It's fair to say I spend a lot of time with you guys, maybe too much, and I've seen a couple of arguments here and there. Every argument you're going to have for about six months is going to hurt much more than the rest of them. At least they did for me. My husband and I got married, and we'd argue about the dishes or the garbage, and I'd think, "Did I make the biggest mistake of my entire life?" And I didn't; I love him. And you two love each other. Ten years from now, you're not going to remember that the trash didn't make it to the curb on time, or that the dishes didn't get done after work. You're not going to remember those things. You're going to remember today, and all the moments that you made each other laugh, and singing Taylor Swift together in your living room. You're going to remember all of it. So keep those in mind during all your future arguments, and just know that you love each other. Cheers!

I don't know how she did that from memory; that was crazy. I will be using some notes. Most of you know who I am, but if you don't: I'm Cameron, and over the past few years I have come to know Zen not only as one of my closest friends, but as someone I am very proud to call my brother. We didn't start out that way. In fact, when I met Zen, also at work, he was just some punk kid who was a bit down in the dumps. But soon after that, he decided, very quickly, that he wanted to buckle down and move his life in a better direction, and that's exactly what he did.

During that time, I've gotten to see a couple of firsts in Zen's life. I was able to see Zen take his first drink at a bar, and then, a couple months later, he turned 21. I've been able to see Zen earn his first promotion that really meant something at work, and through that promotion I was able to see him purchase his first car that didn't require you to climb through the passenger side to open the driver's door. I saw Zen and Hailey get their first apartment together, their first house together, and their first dog together. And along the way we've all made great memories together as a group. We've laughed together, we've cried together, and we've even sung together, mostly Taylor Swift. Through the ups and downs, your love has made it through every bit of it, and you've finally made it to this day.

I am so excited and proud to watch both of you step into your new roles as husband and wife, and I can't wait to see where life takes you two next. Who knows, maybe I'll be an uncle. And even though Zen won't show up to move your super heavy pull-out couch into your new apartment, I know the two of you will be there for every other aspect of life that matters, not just for your friends, but, more importantly, for each other.

I originally thought I was going to be part of the bridesmaids' group, because I have never seen a man show off a ring, her ring, that many times. I swear I saw it 75 times before he popped the question. He was so excited. And right after he asked, I think Hailey wore one permanent smile for about a month and a half. She might have even been smiling while she was sleeping. That's how I know you two will love each other more than anything in the world, so you two better make this work, because I'm not wasting this speech. Let's all raise a glass to the newlyweds. Here's to a lifetime of happiness, until death do you part.

Okay, I'm gonna cry; I've literally been holding it all day. For those of you who don't know me, I'm Cedar. I've known Hailey since we were children. We met in fifth grade, and we've known each other for so long now. Now she's an aunt to my children, even if it's not by blood. I've known Hailey through so many parts of her life, through so many relationships, and I can truly say this is the happiest I've ever seen her. Meeting Zen for the first time, I could tell they were truly meant to be together. I don't think I've ever had one bad story with Zen in it. All Hailey has is positive things to say, and she's been so happy since having you in her life. Her eyes sparkle like they never have before. I'm so happy they found each other. I love you both.

All right, how many dads and daughters do we have in the room? Not that many. So when I found out my firstborn daughter was going to move in with a guy, I was like, "Oh, no. Who does this guy think he is, that's good enough for my daughter?" But I kept an open mind, and I did see, like we've already mentioned, how happy she was. And Zen grew on us quickly. We know without a doubt that he'll do anything for her, and, like Riley said, it's the happiest I've seen Hailey ever in a relationship. So: welcome to the family that tells jokes about bodily functions at the dinner table. We're gross and disgusting, and we like to have a lot of fun. Welcome.

For those who don't know me, I'm Emily. Hailey is one of my oldest friends; we've been friends since the first grade, so I can't really say how we met, because I'm too young to remember. We both are. But I remember growing up with her: we'd have all of our laughs, we'd get scared by all the ghosts in all the houses, we'd cry about certain things in our lives, and we'd laugh about the funny, silly mistakes we made all the time, the awkward, embarrassing moments, the little crushes in high school that turned out to be not the best ideas.

The way I know Hailey will be not only the best friend, but also the best mother in the future: one New Year's, I decided to visit. This was also the very first time I met Zen, and today is my second time meeting him officially. We went ahead and drank a lot of jungle juice. Now, with the jungle juice, we were also playing Cards Against Humanity, and I remember five minutes into the game I was like, "Hailey, I can't read my cards, you're gonna have to play for me." So, five minutes later, three hours before midnight, I didn't even make it to midnight, I had my head in the toilet, and Hailey was there the entire time rubbing my back while I was crying on the bathroom floor, going, "No, go have fun, have fun!" And she was like, "No, let me help you." She's always there to show you so much love, so much support. I hope Zen knows how lucky he is, because I know how lucky you are. You'd better take the best care of my friend, as I know she will take care of you. Cheers to Hailey and Zen.

For anybody that doesn't know me, my name is Chris. I am one of Hailey's co-workers, and I am beyond grateful to be able to call her my sister. Sorry, Riley, you're going to have to share. I first became close with Hailey because we encountered a very combative patient, and I would not stop apologizing, because Hailey got scratched by this patient and I couldn't stop it. Throughout the many years, many months, oh my god, that I have known Hailey, she is very caring, and I know that she will put anybody before herself. And I am more than happy that she has found Zen, who would do the same thing for her. I'm very happy for both of you, and I love you both very much.

Zen, welcome to the family. We appreciate everything you have to give to Hailey. And like I said, welcome to the family.

I have a lot of stories I could tell, but really what I want to do is say thank you. Zen, thank you for coming into our lives. And if she approves of you, sweetheart, I approve of you.